Top Ten Opening Lines I've Never Used in a New Post
1. I took a recent trip to Insanityland. It was an interesting place to visit, but I wouldn't want to live there. And there weren't any souvenir refrigerator magnets.
2. Why are idiots and politicians allowed to breathe?
3. Why are teenagers allowed to breathe?
4. In the grand scheme of things, life is like a bowl of gumbo. You never know what you're going to spoon up, but every bite tastes a little different. Just enjoy the parts you like, spit out what you don't, and watch out for the slimy bits of okra.
5. Fiery Habeneiro Doritos and long, chocolate covered, cream-filled pastries are the devil.
6. I don't think I should have pissed off the trash man today.
7. It was the best of times, it was the worst of times. (Wait - that was somebody else's.)
8. There is a place where only the very bravest would dare venture. It teems with strange creatures - seen and unseen, foreign smells, and chaos. There are hidden treasures to be unearthed, adventures to be had, mountains of rubble to be excavated. It is my children's bedroom, and I am not brave at all.
9. A funny thing happened on the way to the gynecologist...
10. How did they ever come up with that statistic on how many times men and women think about sex a day? I was obviously not consulted.
2. Why are idiots and politicians allowed to breathe?
3. Why are teenagers allowed to breathe?
4. In the grand scheme of things, life is like a bowl of gumbo. You never know what you're going to spoon up, but every bite tastes a little different. Just enjoy the parts you like, spit out what you don't, and watch out for the slimy bits of okra.
5. Fiery Habeneiro Doritos and long, chocolate covered, cream-filled pastries are the devil.
6. I don't think I should have pissed off the trash man today.
7. It was the best of times, it was the worst of times. (Wait - that was somebody else's.)
8. There is a place where only the very bravest would dare venture. It teems with strange creatures - seen and unseen, foreign smells, and chaos. There are hidden treasures to be unearthed, adventures to be had, mountains of rubble to be excavated. It is my children's bedroom, and I am not brave at all.
9. A funny thing happened on the way to the gynecologist...
10. How did they ever come up with that statistic on how many times men and women think about sex a day? I was obviously not consulted.
posted by Cas at 11:37 AM
2 Comments:
11. I am not crazy, I am 2 states east of crazy.
12. I do not cause caos, I am caos.
lol - some of those opening lines could be the next best seller - lol - too cute - the funniest thing happened on the way to the ... (fill in here) - sorry did use that in a way on my blog - The funniest thing happened on the way to fixing dinner - and that was the night my son got the metal ring on his finger and we spent several hours and umpteen manpower hours getting the stupid thing cut off his finger -
Humor - we all need this every once in a while and this was the perfect time for me- E :)
Post a Comment
<< Home