Monday, February 23, 2009

Happily Ever After

I am free of Walgreens! Hurray!!!

Today was the first day at my new job as admissions coordinator/marketing director of Cleveland Health Care Center. So far, so good.

It was wonderful to be able to come home this afternoon, cook dinner and relax afterwards with Tony Bourdain and the Travel Channel.

It feels strangely odd to have a normal occupation again.

Odd, but enchanting.

Monday, February 16, 2009

God is not surprised

Lorna is in the hospital. She had undiagnosed high blood pressure and diabetes. I spoke with her when she went in on Friday afternoon. She was in good spirits. She'd had a minor stroke but fully expected to be released on Saturday. Then Saturday morning she had another stroke while she was still in the hospital. She is paralyzed on her left side now. They expect that she'll recover somewhat, with a lot of hard work and rehabilitation.

I went and saw her yesterday. She was in and out of it. Her speech is slurred and she had a hard time trying to speak clearly, trying to find the right words. I feel utterly helpless.

Her family is talking about taking her back to the Bahamas. It makes me so sad. She was just here a couple of weeks ago. We visited and laughed and watched tv together.

I'm tired of life throwing me curve balls.

Sunday, February 08, 2009

A walk on the vile side

Not very long ago, on a bright sunny day, my delightful husband and I were driving along in the car, enjoying each other's company. We have a mature, committed relationship, as well as a healthy respect for each other's wants and needs.

At least that's what I thought.

Shortly into our journey, I began to smell a noxious odor in the car. Subtle at first, the stench soon began to permeate the interior. I feared a dead animal had become lodged under the hood and the evidence of its decomposition was coming through the a/c vent.

Sniff. Crinkled nose. "I smell something. Do you smell something?"

He began to snicker.

"Oh my God. Did you fart?"

He burst into laughter and I knew. The honeymoon was over.

Frantically, I began jamming the down button on my window, but nothing happened. The odorous stench was growing like a nuclear mushroom cloud. And the windows were locked shut.

"OMG - I can't roll down the window!" Panic set in as I feared loss of consciousness. It was either laugh or pass out. I couldn't help it. I started laughing, too.

He was driving and the unlock button was on his side, but at this point he was laughing too hard to press it. He was laughing so hard, it was all he could do to keep the car on the road. Tears began to stream down his face and mine too. I couldn't tell if it was from the laughing or the noxious vapor enveloping the two of us.

The smell was so bad, it was even starting to get to my DH. He helplessly started slapping at the window controls until his own window rolled halfway down. His own window! My screech was enough to send him into another fit of laughing hysterics.

Thankfully, his love for me is so great, he finally got himself together enough to unlock my window. And my love for him is so great, he survived with his manhood intact.

We may not have a mature relationship, but we are definitely committed.

Or at least we should be, anyway.

Monday, February 02, 2009

Baring a vein

I started writing a new column for The Montgomery County News. It's called To Be Perfectly Honest and I guess my first entry is about as loud a statement as I can make about how much I dislike my current job situation. And probably proof positive that I should not be inflicting my current state of mind onto the world.

One person who read it said, "It's probably okay for The Montgomery County News... but it could get back to where you work." She went on to say that I should inject humor into my writing in order to get away with what I had to say and that I should continue writing because "it's therapeutic."


That's about as clear a message I can get that I'm so far gone and out of touch I don't even know what I'm writing anymore.

I had to really think about her first comment before I decided I really don't care if what I wrote gets back to my job. But the part that got to me was the humor thing. I thought I had written the piece with my tongue firmly planted in cheek, but instead I guess it came across as bitter. And now it's out there for everyone to see.

Oh well. The name of the column is "To Be Perfectly Honest." And I was. Maybe it's time for someone to lay it out there. Even if it's wrong.

The link is on my sidebar - you can read it for yourself.